For God's sake

If you happened to miss Bush's acceptance speech last night, here's the quick, 5-minute version.

While reading, to get the true effect of our great leader's oratory style, pronounce every word distinctly as if you are just learning to read, open your mouth extra wide, smirk arrogantly at inappropriate times, the word is "terra" not "terror," and look sort of bemused and self-satisfied unless you're looking at the teleprompter, in which case you'll be concentrating so hard on not mispronouncing anything that your eyes will actually drill holes through the screen.

Good evening. Historically terror terrorists Afghanistan Iraq. Prevail lower taxes more military spending terror Iraq history God. Terror, terrorism terrorists terror 9-11 terror. Iraq, Saddam, al Qaeda terrorist terror freedom pride September 11 prevail historical defend defend terror.

My opponent flip flop hates military loves the gays tax-and-spend shadowy groups activist judges not for children opposes medical reform wants old people to die and kicks dogs.

Terror. Terrorism. Terrorists. Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq. Fear, evil, terror, blood, war, weapons, destruction, terrorism here and abroad, more terror, and also Iraq.

Security prevail history domestic 9-11 al Qaeda Saddam Iraq Afghanistan. Employment! Terror, evil. God! Iraq, Iraq, defend, support, terrorism, the children. Saddam evil. Italy Australia support defend allies fear war terrorism blow shit up.

God. Me. You. Us. Them. Terror.

Nighters!