Fido flunky

If you think you’ve seen everything, think again, and also take comfort in your ideas about that stupid hobby of yours that someone said might make a good business because, well, it can’t be as silly as nameadog.com, where, for $30 and a picture of your pooch, site owner Jenny send you just the exact perfect name for your dog, so you don’t have to go to all that trouble!

Jenny will send you three names, and if you find you don’t actually like them she’ll return your money, satisfaction guaranteed!

So if you’re still sitting on your fat ass wishing you could think of a way to make Google gazillions from just one good Internet Idea like Dog Namer, here are some other professions to consider:

• Errant Sock Replacement Services


• Seasoning Consultant (how much salt is too much?)


• Diet Coke Selection Expert (With lime? Vanilla? Plain? TAB? Splenda? Bottle or can?)


• Carpet Height Admin.


• Boredom Aleviation Manager


• Web Site Navigation Label Specialist


• Shirt Tucking Advisor


• Meme Wrangler

WiFined

Benjamin Smith III of St. Petersburg, Florida used to park his SUV outside the home of Richard Dinon for one reason only — to steal his WiFi! Shocked and appalled, Dinon called the police and had Smith arrested for using someone else’s bandwidth.

Is this even a crime? If Dinon left his WiFi network wide open, which he did, and Smith was sitting outside on a public street and just happened to have his laptop and just happened to find the signal and just happened to… you know, it is kind of creepy. But is it stealing?

Florida law enforcement arrested Smith for unauthorized access to a computer network, which counts as a third-degree felony. So I suppose it really is a crime — at least in Florida.